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September 2009 
Agonies and Ecstasies, Emergence and Mergence...
LaSara
Included: LaSara's Note * NEWS! * Super-Limited Offer for Intensives * Ecstatic Presence Assignment for Play!
Beloved,
If you're not one of the readers who joined my middle east updates list
If you did sign up for my updates, you got to hear a bit about my travels,
though the process I am undergoing in all this is so HUGELY
transformational, trying to get even a taste of it into e-zine form is like
trying to catch a deluge in a thimble.
So, we'll just start where we are; Ramadan kareem! Yes, I am observing the
fast of Ramadan. I never could have foreseen this, but I don't know why. It
makes perfect sense. Beginning after my first trip to the Holy Land, I
started studying Islam. My most recent trip ended just as Ramadan began. My
first day home was the first day of Ramadan.
While in Bethlehem, the excitement level was rising. I was invited by many
to extend my trip and to spend Ramadan in their homes. (Yeah, the whole
month. I have never met with such utter hospitality.) I couldn't, though if
I had been able to I certainly would have. Leaving was difficult as it was,
and I would have loved to have spent this holy time in a Muslim community.
Instead, I came home, and have taken Ramadan by myself. I am studying deep
into Islam, and have found many elements that speak directly to my heart.
The spiritual side of Islam appeals to me than any other religion I have
studied. (Notice I didn't say spiritual path, I specifically said
religion.) The spiritual aspect is Mysticism. Direct relationship with God,
no mediation, the awareness that God is both imminent and transcendent.
The law and politics side is more sticky, tricky, trigger-happy for me.
And for both these things I am exceedingly grateful. The part that makes
sense with no need for translation. The part that is my home already, is my
heart, my love, my life, my surrender, my path. The part where God is, and
i am.
And, the part that is so alien that I can't look directly at it without
engaging in separation.
How does all of it "make perfect sense?" I could not have thought of a
better way to pull "my self" outside of myself; outside of the known,
outside of the assumed, outside of the easy, the comfortable, the illusory.
Sometimes it's too easy to fall into ease, and not even realize that Truth
Eternal has been sacrificed in the offing.
Ego rebuilds itself moment to moment, assuming new shapes to hold, contain,
divide, define itself by. Even the idea of enlightenment can stand in the
way of our relationship with It.
So, the perfection lies in being stretched beyond my own edges in a way
that I ask for again and again. Through the frame of Islam, I can see God
unchanged, unchanging. The way I have come to know It. I can also see where
my ego is attached to the way I encounter God, approach God, conceive of
God.
One of the big jokes of it all (and there are many, many Big Jokes for me
in the terrain of my dissembling soul), is that God cannot be approached.
God is. Eternal. Everywhere present, but in no one place localized. Beyond
our comprehension. So, even on the mental level, God cannot be approached.
As Mystic, I can say that all paths to the Divine are equal, while knowing
that "path" is a misnomer, and "to the" a misleading statement. Even naming
It, whether "Divine" or "God" is a veil.
"love is a veil between lover and loved
Even the idea of love is separation. In claiming a beloved, earthly or
divine, we put ourselves into separation. Through this separation we have
the chance to seek reunion.
Just as delineation limits by virtue of fixing "some thing" in place, love
and aversion limit by placing things outside of ourselves, which creates
something outside of The Other, as well. There is a sense of "the thing I
am", or "the thing I am not." Both reinforce division.
But where better to see my assumed flaws, faults, assumed strengths? Where
better to see my attachments?
In this, the healing of the world.
As my sense of self lies shattered into pieces on the ground around me, I
laugh, and I cry. Some shards melt into the earth and become cells of the
ageless soil. Some wisps of vapor, becoming the unchanging air. Some become
sparks of light and join with the unwavering light of the sun.
And even beyond the joining with the geological and universal, each element
in its time fades and joins the eternal, returning to the first home, the
last home, the home that is now, and always will be; the heart of The One.
In the midst of the agonies and the ecstasies of mergence, emergence,
mergence...I come back to the moments of peace where there is no
separation.
What if "that I am," were true of everything. What if inside and outside
were an illusion? What if there were no line between work and life.
Relationships with people and with God. Spiritual path and life, just as it
is.
Cessation. At the heart of it all is surrender. The moment where lover and
beloved are not two, but one. Nay, are none.
Ma salaam,
-LaSara/Fatima Abd-Rahim
NEWS! NEWS! NEWS!
Manifestation IS! I am...
AND THIS JUST IN! SEXY WITCH Becomes Multi-Lingual!
UPCOMING PUBLICATION: FILISTINA, YA HABIBI
***
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The Ecstatic Presence Assignment for Play! "That I Am."
We are intimately connected to everything, everywhere. When we put
something outside of ourselves, we are engaging in the practice of
division. This practice can be a useful path to union, but even the path
can get in the way of the destination, because in reality there is no
destination. We are, as We have been, as We will always be. When you feel separation - whether through love, longing, desire,
rejection, repulsion, hope, definition, clinging, etc. - realize you are
that, too. You are the thing you desire, you have the thing you long for,
you are one with the thing that repulses you. All things are held within God. God is in all things. We are each part of
this grand tapestry, and are never separate from the All That Is.
more than this I am not allowed to say."
Jalal-ud-Din Rumi
I'm in James Twyman's upcoming film on the most powerful manifestation
technology ever issued, The Moses Code! The release date is planned for
April 5, and I intend to be in Bethlehem headlining an event for the
international release celebration, ensh'llah. This will be on the heels of
my first Global Family Awakening tour, to Palestine. STAY TUNED for details
on both!
Sexy Witch is going to be published in Spanish, Czech, and Russian!!!!
Cool, yeah?
My first chapbook of poetry (and some fluid and fluent prose) will be
available on a VERY LIMITED basis, very SOON! Keep your eyes peeled to
order!
by LaSara FireFox
Access: Public
